Posts tagged Xander
We only made it to the beach twice while Xander was here for christmas break. He is always so happy when we go. It made me realize that going to the beach with Xander is my favorite thing to do, my favorite place to be. It’s kind of a big deal, actually.
Before Mike moved to Ypsi we took turns visiting each other. When I came to LA we would always visit the beach. I would day dream about the day I got to bring Xander. I wondered if he would love it as much as I do. I would sit with Mike and wonder if I would ever even be able to bring Xander to the beach. I guess the beach became, in some way, the symbol for where I wanted to be, where I wanted Xander to be, where I wanted our lives to go.
Our decision to move to LA was not made lightly. Our move was not without struggle and heart ache. The first time we brought Xander to LA was exciting and stressful for me. There are so many things that I love about where we live and there was a small part of me that feared Xander would hate them…for whatever his reasons.
Xander’s first time at the beach was christmas eve night December 2010. There was a musician playing on the boardwalk, and Xander loved it but was too shy to dance. Once he put his feet in the sand there was no turning back. He loved it. We walked a little way onto the beach but Xander just wanted to run! I remember hanging back, while Mike and Xander ran to the water, and crying. Crying tears of happiness, for once….
The water was cold on our feet but he didn’t care. He was happy, he was joyful and for the first time in a long time I felt like everything was going to be ok. A few days after that we went back during the day so he could play in the sand. Oh boy did he play in the sand! Rolling head over heals, climbing on the rocks, running in the waves.
Xander was 6 when he first came to LA and of course I had seen him happy and excited, but never like this…he was just full of pure joy :)
Now, when I talk about going to the beach he plays off his excitement in typical Xander fashion. But I know it’s his favorite place too. I can tell when we’re driving and he catches the first glimpse of the water. I imagine we have the same expression on our faces.
So, that is why going to the beach with Xander is my favorite thing in the whole world.
The End
When Xander and I made the trip back to Michigan at the end of his Christmas break our flight got in late so we got a room near the airport. The next morning I woke up super early, ate something, got cleaned up and piddled around until Xander began to wake up. I was laying next to him watching TV when he opened his eyes and said ” Mom I woke up before you..I woke up before you”. Then he put his arm over his face and fell back asleep for another hour :)
He’s so funny.
<3
This past summer was Xander’s first here in L.A. I’m so use to Mike taking video of everything we do that I forget to take video on my own. While digging through old clips and trying to put little videos together I realize that my video footage stash is lacking! We did so many cool things over the summer, Disneyland, Universal City, camping in the mountains, La Brea tar pits, movie nights, play dates and tons of other things I failed to capture on video.
Luckily I take photos like a crazy person :P
Xander eating cheez-its at Poppy’s house :) He has little string bean legs and is the most amazing kid I’ve ever met. And, he loves crackers.
Last week I made a routine trip to Michigan to pick up Xander and bring him here to L.A. Our time for this visit was less than 10 days. I can’t begin to express what has been happening the last couple of years, struggle after struggle, brick wall after brick wall, and now we’re at this point in our lives. I think Xander, Mike and myself have dealt with a lot of nonsense together and while, unfortunately, we’re still dealing with it I’m proud of us. I’m proud of Xander B. for being such a smart, kind, funny and sweet little man. I’m proud of Mike for all he’s done amidst the craziness that has been our lives lately, and I guess I’m proud of myself for not going completely insane. ha.
I know that my concentration on my photography lapsed a great deal. I think my anxiety about not being creative sent me into a self-induced, spiraling depression. I’ve spent many, many hours beating myself up about it and wasted a lot of time. Now I’m past the point of caring if anyone else sees that as lazy or unfocused and I’m past the point of caring to listen to the part of me that wants to tell me I’m not good enough. I am on the exit ramp of a hellatious 4 years of my life. On multiple occasions Mike encouraged me to talk about it, write about it or try and share and connect with people in some way. I think he thought that would help me get through things. Of course I like to do things the hard way so I ignored that advice. In reality I think I was just shaken to the core from losing my Mother, finishing school, legal fights for Xander, losing my Grandmother, losing my 9-5 job, and then the move to L.A. and some more legal battles over Xander.
I’ll be honest, I expected this blog post to be laconic as usual with some images attached. It was beautiful, as always, to spend some time with Xander. He’s growing up so fast and every time I take a photo of him he looks more and more grown up. This realization sparked a panic in me and I might have been a little overbearing with the camera this time, as you can see by his disapproving face in a lot of these images, but he lived and is virtually unharmed.
I picked some of my favorites to share, hope you all like them. The light in my kitchen and bedroom is fabulous as well as in the back of our building. It’s all natural and filtered and warm. The alley behind our place is where I shot my recent self portraits. Now if I can just pull Mike away from his computer long enough to shoot him too.
(by Erica Hampton)
This is for our families who we missed seeing this x-mas so that Xander, Mike and myself could spend our first x-mas together in California. This two weeks has been full of firsts for Xander; his first time on a plane, his first time in California, his first time to pet a shark, his first time at the ocean and many other adventures. We wish you could see the joy and wonder on Xander’s face the first time he went to the beach. I have to say it was probably the happiest moment of my life to date :) This iPhone pic pretty much sums up his joy, rolling head over heals in the sand and giggling every time the waves touched his legs. Thanks for not disowning us for spending Christmas at the beach ;P Love, Erica, Mike and Xander
